Crosswords - The Pick Up Artist

Hey, beautiful. I couldn't help but notice you standing across the room, looking beautiful and lonely. And I remember thinking that all you needed was an arm around your shoulder and someone to talk to. What are you drinking? Looks tasty. Can I have a... No, no.... You don't have to call over the bouncer. Ha. Ha. I was just joking, see look at me. I'm laughing! You're laughing! Wow, God. It's good to laugh. Ha. Ha. Ha. Wow. You know, it's amazing, I feel like we just met and yet I'm already feeling this connection to you. Like I've already spent time camped outside your bedroom window with binoculars. What? No! No way! No! That must have been someone else driving a red Toyota Camry. Say, let's change the subject, you know I don't mean to be forward but, is it just me or do you seem a bit uncomfortable right now? Hmm? How about we ditch this crazy joint and go back to my place. I've got a pantry full of rip olives and a DVR filled with Hoarder's episodes, huh? How bout it? Or we could swing by here and solve my new crossword puzzle, or we could-- Woah! Woah! Okay, okay! I get the idea! You don't have to spray me with mace in the face twice!

After-Math

Just letting you know, I've got a new crossword up. I'm really proud of the theme, though the grid's not the greatest. But so far, no complaints, and usually when I do something stupid like misspell something or have an inappropriate clue my inbox is filled with emails letting me know. So far, so good.

Four Square

Greetings puzzlers! With all of this Interactive Fiction talk, you might have thought I'd forgotten about you. But the crossword bug rises yet again and today I'm giving you a doozy.

I present to you four separate 5x5 crossword grids. Your job? solve them! I've even given you the middle letter of each grid. But, because I'm being so nice, I've decided to muddy the waters a bit. Below you'll find four groups of ten clues each. Each clue is to one of the ten five letter words in each grid. But the clues are in random order. Only on solution (I'm pretty sure) is available for each grid. Also, not only are the clues in random order, but each group of clues is also in random order. So the first group of clues do not necessarily correspond to the first grid. Keep an eye on those middle letters, as they're your only hint as to which group of clues belongs in which grid.

Don't worry, it's not as hard as it sounds... or is it...? I'll have the solution to this puzzle and the movie puzzle on Wednesday! Until then, good luck! I'll start the IF game reviews tomorrow!

Clues after the jump: